Det er nok lidt en kliché, men to af mine største inspirationskilder er min mor og min far. Jeg har haft masser af opture i livet, men mindst ligeså mange nedture. Idag vil jeg dele et brev fra min far med jer, som dumpede ind af døren i 2008, da jeg spillede fodbold i Norge. Det er ret personligt og måske også lidt for personligt, men som min boi Gero Joshua tweetede til mig: “at times being too personal is the only way”. Jeg læser brevet næsten ugentligt, for at inspirere og holde mit fokus på de rette ting. Det er langt, men jeg håber I vil læse det hele og at det måske kan inspirere andre på samme måde som det stadigvæk inspirerer mig. Nå, men nok udenom snak. Her er det så:
To My Son,
Jamil, we have spent almost 21 years together and you have been a blessing to your Mother and I. We have shared a lot of adventures together here at home and far away, in places like Hawaii and Thailand. A stupid accident almost caused your death in my arms. I will never forget that moment. I have watched you develop a love for music and sports which has brought many friends into your life, and into mine also. Our home has always been full of your friends and they have in turn brought a sense of belonging into your life. Your mother and I have been blessed with you and Julia. There have been no major problems for us and we brag about our children with pride. As a child, you were always full of life, as you hopped around trying to get people to laugh… but now no one is laughing. You are a man now and everyone is watching… judging, expecting, and mostly… watching. They are no longer expecting amusement. They may laugh with you on occasion as the jokester continues to joke, but what they really hope for is to see their friend become a man of respect.
Son, character is defined by the things you do, when no one is looking. Respect is gained by the things you do, NOT TALK ABOUT. Character will support you in gaining respect. At birth I was able to see that you were born with talents that could help you rise up above the average person you would grow up with. Intellect, physical skills, and a warm personality are attributes that can pave the way toward a rich and successful life. By rich, I don’t mean with a lot of money. If that happens, fine.
Oprah Winfrey, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Charles Barkley, Bill Cosby, Stevie Wonder, Charlie Parker, Dizzy Gillespie… The list goes on and on. These people grew up poor and regarded by society as second class citizens. They worked hard and didn’t let ANYTHING get in the way. Laziness, alcohol, drugs, the opposite sex, and lack of discipline, are the main culprits in “NOT” achieving one’s goals. And don’t mistake self-confidence for an inflated ego.
Jamil, I have watched how you apply yourself in all areas of your life. School, your room, self-training, a job, things that take discipline to keep functioning. There is an old saying that says, “You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can’t fool everybody all of the time.” People are watching. The same people that can help you get where you want to be.
I’ve been around Son, in places you can’t imagine. Music has taken me into the hell holes of the world that was full of some real scum people. Being Black in the 50’s and 60’s and beyond, didn’t help matters. Character and respect became and still is ultra important. You can’t buy it, you can’t win it, you can’t steal it. You have to work for it.
Jamil, your Mother and I are very concerned about you. You’ve shown no interest in school and education. You rely far too much on gambling. Your living habits are not professional and will not help you in sports. Why do you think the rest of the world will accept these habits and even pay you big money for it? I’m confused. I know a lot of successful people and they all had one thing in common. Dedication and discipline.
When you were born, after you were asleep and we knew everything was okay, I ran home to create your birth chart. When I returned mommy asked me what I saw. I said that there was a lot of energy in you… perhaps too much energy. I predicted that you would be an athlete. But I also told her that I was worried about alcohol abuse and visions of grandeur (getting a whole lot of something for nothing). Creativity was also a part of that picture. These statements were made one hour after you were born. The same place where that information was revealed also told me that energy can go to sleep. Discipline will go with it. Self motiviation can be a problem. The easy way out appeals to you. The easy way out will only bring failure. Laziness can easily become more important than effort. It is so much easier to fall from high positions that it is to get there.
Jamil, I call these charts, God’s diary. You may not believe in God but one thing is for sure. You cannot escape God’s epitaphs. Life, death, the unique twists at age 7-14-21, and the big on at ages 28-30. You can become no more or less than what is promised at birth. This Mars-Neptune thing that is present in your chart is found in Jordan’s, Charles Manson’s, Dr. J’s, “Magic” Johnson’s, Earl Monroe’s, Henry Fearrington’s, Rick James’, Justin Fearrington’s, Charlie Parker’s, Ray Charles’, and many other well know athletes and musicians. All had one of the Mars-Neptune characteristics prominent in their lives. Alcohol, sex, or gambling controlled it and created huge problems for them. These people became either famous or succesful in spite of these “problems”, but their personal lives became a living hell.
I’m worried about whether you can control these urges or not. Up until now it doesn’t seem so. The people around you are noticing and are also concerned. I’ve always told you that saying no was going to be your biggest problem. Controlling your passions, your emotions, your desires, is a major step towards building character… especially while no one is looking. This thing with FCK has gone unexplained in a proper fashion by you or the team leaders. We feel very disappointed because we don’t know anything. All we can see is the stupid article that was released on the internet, The Politiken article, and all of the other negative activity leading up to now. We know that deep inside you just want to be a winner and liked by all. It seems though that you aren’t willing to do what is necessary to ensure that these goals will be accomplished.
You were born with luck and talent. Wasted luck tells the powers to be that you shouldn’t have it. I know it sounds silly to you but Karma is as real as the morning Sun. There are opposite and equal reactions to everything you do… both physically and spiritually. In the end, you get what you deserve, especially at age 28-29.
I hope you take my writings to heart and try to understand that I am taking this time because I love you and hope for the best. I don’t care if you have a career at Netto or become a winner in sports. I do care that you do the right thing for yourself and don’t waste resources. I’m sad that my former employer, Kirsten Cornelius, had to call me about your grades. I’m sad that FCK has turned their back on you. I’m sad that your future is unpredictable and that you haven’t controlled opportunity when it presented itself. But it’s not too late.
Get your sleep and diet together
Get smarter with your money and stop relying on gambling
Form a better discipline about everything
Don’t show your ego through your mouth… do it with actions… words mean nothing
Try to get some kind of spiritual orientation in your life
(control it, or it will surely control you)
Learn to say no and don’t be so eager to impress you friends
Brevet tvang mig til at se grundigt i spejlet og jeg kan kun takke min far for at guide mig den rigtige vej i livet. I love you, pops.